boxing day 07

i seem to have a habit of updating the blog in the beginning of the month and end of the month. what the hell is wrong with me? it's probably because i don't have any days off in between (hint hint, nudge nudge mr. kok wing).

another year has passed, i didn't see much progress on my part, i seem to be stuck in a rut since coming back but it's ok, a slave to a wage is way better than staring at four walls without a wage. here are my reflections of the year before i forget them all:

#1. things are never what they seem. when i was abroad i was so homesick that all i could think of was coming back home, even if it meant sacrificing a good job. i questioned myself profusely day & night regarding the conditions back home and reassured myself that i could do it. * mental note to self - think about it. i love working in NZ but to be truthful it wasn't going to go anywhere, i would have been too comfortable and would have eventually craved for excitement elsewhere.

#2. no regrets. though i may bitch about coming back, but i don't regret it. the good outweigh the bad but being human beings we can't stop but to compare. yes, i do remember the easy life abroad, i do remember important people in my life but people come and go, partnerships float apart and some things are just not meant to be. if everyone knew their destiny, where would be the fun?

#3. self importance. i take better care of myself now. i make it a point to go for resistance training every 3 days in a week. So much so, my niece asks why are you going exercising so late? i go to the gym at 930 for the 10pm session and finish about midnite. i think i've reached the point where i MUST realise that im no longer 25 but 35 and the years of rebelliousness must now be replaced with years of wary. it's good to now not say, i'm round because im prosperous OR i smoke because i don't have a reason to stop. the excuses (i use and many others use) will always be excuses, i choose to not have anymore excuses.

as i get ready for next year's mess, i think i've overcome significant obstacles; there will be more that's for sure, i just hope it isn't anything compared to this year. but then again where would be the fun aye*?

* goddamn kiwi slang rearing its ugly head